A Personal Story About Breast Cancer Recovery
By Brad Shamis, Ph.D
Licensed Psychologist
By Brad Shamis, Ph.D
Licensed Psychologist
While I was driving down I-95, my pager pulsed a cacophony of “Beep, Beep, Beep.” “Call home…urgent.” My mind raced. Had there been an accident? Was someone hurt? Had somebody died?
The 20 minute drive to my office seemed endless. I started thinking about my wife Harriet and her recent mammogram. I shuddered at the thought of the dreaded “C” word and fought off negative thoughts about Harriet having cancer.
When I talked with her, Harriet’s shaky voice confirmed my suspicions. She’d been told that she had one, possibly two malignant tumors. She was urged to see a surgeon right away. Our response to the diagnosis was utter anguish and unrelenting tears. My sense of security in this life was shattered. Harriet and I had to face the shock of a potentially deadly disease and its pain and suffering. Disbelief, denial and despair flooded our lives. Anger and depression surfaced, with questions of, “Why me?” and “Could I have prevented this?”
The Grief Process
Someone once said being diagnosed with cancer is like being dropped out of a helicopter into a war zone…only you have no compass, no weapons, no map, no survival training of any kind. As a psychologist, I searched my professional “tool box” for ways to support myself and my family.
I knew of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’ research with dying patients. Her work identified five stages of the Grief Process…the process of facing situations involving a loss, especially a potentially fatal situation. She had identified them as denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. “This can’t be happening to me.” There’s an overwhelming sense of shock, disbelief, dismay. Cancer patients and their families feel they’re in a dream state. They may dismiss or diminish the diagnosis. (“It’s a mistake.”)
The anger stage consists of mood changes, temperamental behavior and annoyance about having to confront the loss. Cancer patients and their loved ones may feel angry with themselves, their Higher Power, or their medical personnel.
Bargaining is deal making between the patient and a Higher Power. “Cure me God and I promise I’ll be a better person.” Family members make deals too. “Just let everything be OK and I won’t lose my temper ever again.”
The depression stage is the realization that the loss (the disease) is part of the reality of the victim’s life. There’s a sense that control has been lost and recognition that death is a real possibility. Hopelessness (”It doesn’t matter anymore,”) may surface.
The final stage, acceptance is connected with the inner drive to face up to the loss and deal with it. Cancer patients may think, “I can’t control getting the disease, but I can control the treatment.” Patients and their families resolve the live each day to the fullest, doing their very best to combat and overcome the disease.
,br> As we dealt with my wife’s cancer, my family and I went through all five stages of the Grief Process, though not necessarily in their prescribed order.
The Power of Positive Thought Many aspects of breast cancer seem out of control: the onset, the medical maze, and the side effects of conventional treatment. One area can be mastered however, and that is the patient’s mental outlook. Changing one’s attitude may be difficult initially, but with proper support, negative thoughts and feelings can be re-directed. By developing a positive state of mind; helplessness is transformed into empowerment.
Candace Pert, a neuroscientist formerly with the National Institute of Mental Health, has suggested that the mind heals the body because they are interconnected. Burke believes the mind isn’t limited to the brain. Rather, she believes it also encompasses all the nerves and cells. These elements form a communication system that determines what’s needed to maintain health. Positive thoughts send signals to the mind, which prompts the secretion of endorphins; the body’s natural pain-reducing hormones. To combat pain, the development of positive mind power is critical.
One helpful technique in this quest is psychotherapy. Sharing feeling with a counselor gives patients an empathetic environment and a forum to sort through their confusion and terror. Therapy helps to manage feelings and thinking that can hamper recovery. The patient can then mobilize emotional energy for recovery.
Meditation is another helpful technique, along with progressive relaxation exercises. Tensing and relaxing the body leads to decreases in pulse, blood pressure, respiration rate, oxygen consumption and overall metabolism. These physiological responses contribute to stress reduction. Visualization is often used in conjunction with meditation to combat side effects of cancer treatment. The patient creates a vivid mental image of the desired goal, while affirming to herself that it’s attainable.
Watching or reading comedy and laughing heartily is good medicine too. The pain-diminishing effects of laughter were popularized in Norman Cousin’s “Anatomy of An Illness”. Laughter also helps stimulate the secretions of endorphins.
Open communication with friends and family members airs concerns; garners support and avoids feelings of isolation. Support groups can educate, empower and provide comfort. Most of all, being part of a group takes away the sense of being the only one going through it. Groups can be found through phone directories, through the American Cancer Society or by asking your physician.
Finally, the most common technique is prayer…talking formally or informally with one’s Higher Power. Strong belief that the Divine can heal gives help to believers.
Having started traditional treatment methods, Harriet also used imagery, relaxation exercises, prayer, laughter and support groups throughout her recovery. While she wasn’t immune to fear and anxiety, she found these positive methods offered her mental hope, physical strength and pain relief.
A diagnosis of breast cancer causes severe emotional turmoil. While the first step toward recovery is undergoing necessary medical procedures, healing can be greatly enhanced through psychological intervention. Positive mental power alone may not be a cure, but together with medical treatment, it promotes more successful healing.
My wife and I are living proof.
Psychologist, Dr. Brad Shamis has over 30 years of experience treating anxieties, fears and panic disorders. He practices in Bensalem, PA.
The 20 minute drive to my office seemed endless. I started thinking about my wife Harriet and her recent mammogram. I shuddered at the thought of the dreaded “C” word and fought off negative thoughts about Harriet having cancer.
When I talked with her, Harriet’s shaky voice confirmed my suspicions. She’d been told that she had one, possibly two malignant tumors. She was urged to see a surgeon right away. Our response to the diagnosis was utter anguish and unrelenting tears. My sense of security in this life was shattered. Harriet and I had to face the shock of a potentially deadly disease and its pain and suffering. Disbelief, denial and despair flooded our lives. Anger and depression surfaced, with questions of, “Why me?” and “Could I have prevented this?”
The Grief Process
Someone once said being diagnosed with cancer is like being dropped out of a helicopter into a war zone…only you have no compass, no weapons, no map, no survival training of any kind. As a psychologist, I searched my professional “tool box” for ways to support myself and my family.
I knew of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’ research with dying patients. Her work identified five stages of the Grief Process…the process of facing situations involving a loss, especially a potentially fatal situation. She had identified them as denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. “This can’t be happening to me.” There’s an overwhelming sense of shock, disbelief, dismay. Cancer patients and their families feel they’re in a dream state. They may dismiss or diminish the diagnosis. (“It’s a mistake.”)
The anger stage consists of mood changes, temperamental behavior and annoyance about having to confront the loss. Cancer patients and their loved ones may feel angry with themselves, their Higher Power, or their medical personnel.
Bargaining is deal making between the patient and a Higher Power. “Cure me God and I promise I’ll be a better person.” Family members make deals too. “Just let everything be OK and I won’t lose my temper ever again.”
The depression stage is the realization that the loss (the disease) is part of the reality of the victim’s life. There’s a sense that control has been lost and recognition that death is a real possibility. Hopelessness (”It doesn’t matter anymore,”) may surface.
The final stage, acceptance is connected with the inner drive to face up to the loss and deal with it. Cancer patients may think, “I can’t control getting the disease, but I can control the treatment.” Patients and their families resolve the live each day to the fullest, doing their very best to combat and overcome the disease.
,br> As we dealt with my wife’s cancer, my family and I went through all five stages of the Grief Process, though not necessarily in their prescribed order.
The Power of Positive Thought Many aspects of breast cancer seem out of control: the onset, the medical maze, and the side effects of conventional treatment. One area can be mastered however, and that is the patient’s mental outlook. Changing one’s attitude may be difficult initially, but with proper support, negative thoughts and feelings can be re-directed. By developing a positive state of mind; helplessness is transformed into empowerment.
Candace Pert, a neuroscientist formerly with the National Institute of Mental Health, has suggested that the mind heals the body because they are interconnected. Burke believes the mind isn’t limited to the brain. Rather, she believes it also encompasses all the nerves and cells. These elements form a communication system that determines what’s needed to maintain health. Positive thoughts send signals to the mind, which prompts the secretion of endorphins; the body’s natural pain-reducing hormones. To combat pain, the development of positive mind power is critical.
One helpful technique in this quest is psychotherapy. Sharing feeling with a counselor gives patients an empathetic environment and a forum to sort through their confusion and terror. Therapy helps to manage feelings and thinking that can hamper recovery. The patient can then mobilize emotional energy for recovery.
Meditation is another helpful technique, along with progressive relaxation exercises. Tensing and relaxing the body leads to decreases in pulse, blood pressure, respiration rate, oxygen consumption and overall metabolism. These physiological responses contribute to stress reduction. Visualization is often used in conjunction with meditation to combat side effects of cancer treatment. The patient creates a vivid mental image of the desired goal, while affirming to herself that it’s attainable.
Watching or reading comedy and laughing heartily is good medicine too. The pain-diminishing effects of laughter were popularized in Norman Cousin’s “Anatomy of An Illness”. Laughter also helps stimulate the secretions of endorphins.
Open communication with friends and family members airs concerns; garners support and avoids feelings of isolation. Support groups can educate, empower and provide comfort. Most of all, being part of a group takes away the sense of being the only one going through it. Groups can be found through phone directories, through the American Cancer Society or by asking your physician.
Finally, the most common technique is prayer…talking formally or informally with one’s Higher Power. Strong belief that the Divine can heal gives help to believers.
Having started traditional treatment methods, Harriet also used imagery, relaxation exercises, prayer, laughter and support groups throughout her recovery. While she wasn’t immune to fear and anxiety, she found these positive methods offered her mental hope, physical strength and pain relief.
A diagnosis of breast cancer causes severe emotional turmoil. While the first step toward recovery is undergoing necessary medical procedures, healing can be greatly enhanced through psychological intervention. Positive mental power alone may not be a cure, but together with medical treatment, it promotes more successful healing.
My wife and I are living proof.
Psychologist, Dr. Brad Shamis has over 30 years of experience treating anxieties, fears and panic disorders. He practices in Bensalem, PA.
